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Build Confidence First and Learn the Mating Dance After

Too often, men put "techniques" ahead oftrying the hardcore approach on dozens of
building confidence, which results inwomen, and having limited success overall, I
techniques chosen to preserve the ego ratherconcluded that confidence and boldness is not
than a technique chosen because it ensures aenough, by themselves, to attract and seduce.
greater chance of success. For example, inYou need to also allow the woman to do her
some cases it is better to get a woman'spart. The woman's part to play in the
email because you can tell she won't be very"mating dance" is her signalling the man to
reachable on the phone. So if I personallytake things to the next level. It is her
make a decision like that, it is based onrole in the selection process. Once she
good strategy, whereas some other guys willgives the "green light", then you can start
opt for the email route because they aretaking things to the next level, physically.
scared of calling.Another example of goodThis is an example of good strategy. It is
strategy is waiting to approach a woman untilalso showing respect for the natural
she appears most receptive. Shy men wouldmale-female dynamic. You need to respect the
use the she-isn't-receptive clause to avoidprocess.Another example of good strategy is
approaching altogether, as an excuse.meeting women in clubs, using an Indirect
Experienced, confident men, would insteadapproach. If you going in guns-blazing, and
delay approaching until she gives some sortgo up to the girl you want, ignoring her
of sign, indicating the best time tofriends, you will likely be shot down,
approach.The problem with some good matingDESPITE having the confidence to go after
dance strategies is that they are oftenwhat you want. In this case, the best
mis-used (and mis-interpreted) by men who areapproach would be to approach the group of
simply shy towards women and want the easyfriends and get to know them first, before
way out. Therefore, it is my strong beliefshifting focus to the girl you want, and only
that a guy new to the "game" should initiallyafter it becomes clear that SHE would like to
practice a bold, very forward (Direct) styleknow YOU better. It is not a question of
in his interactions with women. Then once hechoosing the latter because you are fearful
builds the confidence he can temper the styleof rejection, but because it is better
with a less aggressive (more Indirect) style,strategy, like a better "chess" position to
which may work better depending on theplay. You'll be thinking to yourself,
circumstances.In the past I have tried an"Yeah...I could go up to that girl and tell
extreme form of Direct (take no prisoners)her I like her, but it's smarter to structure
which upped my confidence and ability to makethe interaction so that she has to chase me a
physical advances at the drop of a hat. I canbit." Someone who is fearful of women would
now WILL IT to happen, whether or not it'sbe thinking to himself, "It is better for my
wise to do that.I have taken the Directego if I don't go after the girl directly,
approach very far on many dates, such asand just focus on talking to the friends
going for the kiss within the first 30instead". The mindset behind this is bad and
minutes, and if she dodged me I wouldwill pollute your "vibe", making you look
playfully say, "you can't avoid my lipsinsecure, and get you shot down just the
forever", and then try again a few minutessame. This is why you need the confidence
later. Or I would caress her leg telling herfirst. Your decision making has to be based
i'm glad she got the chance to get to knowon the externals in front of you, not the
me, etc. I made these physical advances, andinternals holding you back.Now here's the
persisted with them, even when she appearedcounter-argument: Women know you want to
not to be quite ready yet, and many times shesleep with them so may as well be direct
got into it only because of my charm, butabout it, she will appreciate it more. This
even so, the absolute most I ever got was ais a bad mindset and has screwed me up many
makeout, as I was never allowed to go anytimes in the past. It is a bad mindset
further. And I rarely got a second date.Evenbecause, as I said, it neglects the role the
though these women liked my boldness andfemale has to play in the mating dance. Sure,
flirtateous humor, and were laughing with meshe will suspect that you want to sleep with
a lot of the time, something felt off forher, but instinctively she wants you to play
sure simply because I didn't give them ayour cards so that you don't fully act on
chance to do their part in the matingthat desire until she gives you the readiness
dance.The level of boldness I demonstratedsignals. This is the power and philosophy
would have been great to use, but only afterbehind using more Indirect methods.Before she
she gave me some indicator of interest. Thisgives you the readiness signals it's
is obvious when I look at the common threadsperfectly fine to flirt, act confidently, be
between all my successes and all my failures.masculine, etc. It's even okay to touch her
The difference between success and failurea bit beforehand, encouraged even, but don't
could be answered by this one question: Wasgo for the serious advances until she gives
she given a chance to choose me? Was sheyou the signals. And if you're still at the
given the opportunity to let me know that shestage where you are developing your
was ready for me when I made my move?Womenconfidence, then feel free to push the
have many subtle ways of letting the man knowenvelope the same way I did, just don't be
she is ready for him to make a serious move,crude about it, and recognize when "no"
such as touching him, complimenting him,really means no.
looking at him with a sexy gaze, etc.After



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