| Too often, men put "techniques" ahead of | | | | trying the hardcore approach on dozens of |
| building confidence, which results in | | | | women, and having limited success overall, I |
| techniques chosen to preserve the ego rather | | | | concluded that confidence and boldness is not |
| than a technique chosen because it ensures a | | | | enough, by themselves, to attract and seduce. |
| greater chance of success. For example, in | | | | You need to also allow the woman to do her |
| some cases it is better to get a woman's | | | | part. The woman's part to play in the |
| email because you can tell she won't be very | | | | "mating dance" is her signalling the man to |
| reachable on the phone. So if I personally | | | | take things to the next level. It is her |
| make a decision like that, it is based on | | | | role in the selection process. Once she |
| good strategy, whereas some other guys will | | | | gives the "green light", then you can start |
| opt for the email route because they are | | | | taking things to the next level, physically. |
| scared of calling.Another example of good | | | | This is an example of good strategy. It is |
| strategy is waiting to approach a woman until | | | | also showing respect for the natural |
| she appears most receptive. Shy men would | | | | male-female dynamic. You need to respect the |
| use the she-isn't-receptive clause to avoid | | | | process.Another example of good strategy is |
| approaching altogether, as an excuse. | | | | meeting women in clubs, using an Indirect |
| Experienced, confident men, would instead | | | | approach. If you going in guns-blazing, and |
| delay approaching until she gives some sort | | | | go up to the girl you want, ignoring her |
| of sign, indicating the best time to | | | | friends, you will likely be shot down, |
| approach.The problem with some good mating | | | | DESPITE having the confidence to go after |
| dance strategies is that they are often | | | | what you want. In this case, the best |
| mis-used (and mis-interpreted) by men who are | | | | approach would be to approach the group of |
| simply shy towards women and want the easy | | | | friends and get to know them first, before |
| way out. Therefore, it is my strong belief | | | | shifting focus to the girl you want, and only |
| that a guy new to the "game" should initially | | | | after it becomes clear that SHE would like to |
| practice a bold, very forward (Direct) style | | | | know YOU better. It is not a question of |
| in his interactions with women. Then once he | | | | choosing the latter because you are fearful |
| builds the confidence he can temper the style | | | | of rejection, but because it is better |
| with a less aggressive (more Indirect) style, | | | | strategy, like a better "chess" position to |
| which may work better depending on the | | | | play. You'll be thinking to yourself, |
| circumstances.In the past I have tried an | | | | "Yeah...I could go up to that girl and tell |
| extreme form of Direct (take no prisoners) | | | | her I like her, but it's smarter to structure |
| which upped my confidence and ability to make | | | | the interaction so that she has to chase me a |
| physical advances at the drop of a hat. I can | | | | bit." Someone who is fearful of women would |
| now WILL IT to happen, whether or not it's | | | | be thinking to himself, "It is better for my |
| wise to do that.I have taken the Direct | | | | ego if I don't go after the girl directly, |
| approach very far on many dates, such as | | | | and just focus on talking to the friends |
| going for the kiss within the first 30 | | | | instead". The mindset behind this is bad and |
| minutes, and if she dodged me I would | | | | will pollute your "vibe", making you look |
| playfully say, "you can't avoid my lips | | | | insecure, and get you shot down just the |
| forever", and then try again a few minutes | | | | same. This is why you need the confidence |
| later. Or I would caress her leg telling her | | | | first. Your decision making has to be based |
| i'm glad she got the chance to get to know | | | | on the externals in front of you, not the |
| me, etc. I made these physical advances, and | | | | internals holding you back.Now here's the |
| persisted with them, even when she appeared | | | | counter-argument: Women know you want to |
| not to be quite ready yet, and many times she | | | | sleep with them so may as well be direct |
| got into it only because of my charm, but | | | | about it, she will appreciate it more. This |
| even so, the absolute most I ever got was a | | | | is a bad mindset and has screwed me up many |
| makeout, as I was never allowed to go any | | | | times in the past. It is a bad mindset |
| further. And I rarely got a second date.Even | | | | because, as I said, it neglects the role the |
| though these women liked my boldness and | | | | female has to play in the mating dance. Sure, |
| flirtateous humor, and were laughing with me | | | | she will suspect that you want to sleep with |
| a lot of the time, something felt off for | | | | her, but instinctively she wants you to play |
| sure simply because I didn't give them a | | | | your cards so that you don't fully act on |
| chance to do their part in the mating | | | | that desire until she gives you the readiness |
| dance.The level of boldness I demonstrated | | | | signals. This is the power and philosophy |
| would have been great to use, but only after | | | | behind using more Indirect methods.Before she |
| she gave me some indicator of interest. This | | | | gives you the readiness signals it's |
| is obvious when I look at the common threads | | | | perfectly fine to flirt, act confidently, be |
| between all my successes and all my failures. | | | | masculine, etc. It's even okay to touch her |
| The difference between success and failure | | | | a bit beforehand, encouraged even, but don't |
| could be answered by this one question: Was | | | | go for the serious advances until she gives |
| she given a chance to choose me? Was she | | | | you the signals. And if you're still at the |
| given the opportunity to let me know that she | | | | stage where you are developing your |
| was ready for me when I made my move?Women | | | | confidence, then feel free to push the |
| have many subtle ways of letting the man know | | | | envelope the same way I did, just don't be |
| she is ready for him to make a serious move, | | | | crude about it, and recognize when "no" |
| such as touching him, complimenting him, | | | | really means no. |
| looking at him with a sexy gaze, etc.After | | | | |