How to Commit and Make the Right Decisions

Do you stand immobile at a fork in your career road?are the road signs of every decision you make. What
Do you feel ambiguous about your job, relationship oryou do is a part of the whole and can affect many
purpose? Here are some helpful tips to find the rightother lives. Make sure the voice in your head is your
path to solid psychological ground.own and that your decisions are not just what you
1. Commit to Yourself First.were "told" by someone else. List your personal goals
Commitment to yourself means that you workand values and really think them through. Your health,
hardest for your dreams and goals, not everyoneyour family's health, your children as a priority, your
else's. Do you feel powerless? You are powerful. Thejob as a priority, love, peace of mind, safety, clean
power to change is already in you. Yourworld, food, and water, honesty, integrity, sacrificing
accomplishments reflect your commitment becausenow for the a peaceful, secure future, God, and
even with some bad luck along the way, committedcountry-all are possible directions and values to
people can become president or famous or happy.incorporate in your plan. Think of each of these
You can rarely attain big goals without commitmentvirtues in the big picture, from a global perspective
as a top value. Commitment means that if youright down to your own neighborhood and your life.
decide to lose five pounds or fifty, you do not takeWhat relationship do you want our world leaders to
a few walks then give up. Instead, you work up to ahave with each other-a healthy assertive balanced
walk of an hour or two each day until you succeed.relationship or an abusive aggressive hate-creating
Commitment means that your finish the projects.one?
Commitment means you show up. Whatever it6. Stand Up
takes, you are committed. Commitment starts in theIf you just lie there like a doormat, everyone will
morning and runs until you fall asleep. A nastywalk all over you. That is your fault for lying down on
failure-voice that says you deserve a break or athe floor and letting them. The stronger, more
treat is not your friend. Commitment bears the painaggressive person will trudge right over you to get
and deserves the win of growth.what they want. Until the weaker person becomes
2. This is Your Doingstronger, to the point of balance and equity, his or
Where you are today is a result of your patternsher business and personal relationships are horribly
and past choices. Repeat often, "I gladly takeunbalanced and eventually fail. Will the strong-willed
responsibility for changing my life." If you blamepartner notice the inequity of the relationship and
someone else, the world, your partner or Godhelp the weaker one? No. Whatever is different
because you are not happy, then you will remainabout your beliefs, you can voice your opinion and
absolutely glued to your excuses and blaming. To gethave a "say." Because each time you do, the prison
control of your own life means you stop whining anddoor opens a little more for oppressed people
blaming others. If you want things to be different,everywhere.
then you make the choice to be the one to do it.7. Take the Hurts
Other people are busy with their own lives. They willTake your hits like a winner, admit that you blew it,
walk right over you and not even notice that youmake the best of a situation or leave it, then
were waiting for someone to make you happy, tocontinue to whistle while you work. No one wants to
fix your pain or to balance your checkbook. What iscome near a big baby, much less take the time to
the point of a lame attitude that is mostly concernedassist you in achieving your personal goals if you just
with looking innocent? "I didn't do it." Would you wantsit there complaining. Choose to take responsibility for
those words to be a synopsis of an entireyou, stand up, move forward and clean up any mess
irresponsible life? After today, eagerly say, "I did it!"yourself.
regarding your life decisions.8. There is Room at the Top
3. Who Do You Want to Be?Greed spawns much abuse around the world. You
Sometimes societal pressures push you intocan be someone better than that. Helping others
desperately settling for any job or relationship just tosucceed will build your success and is far more
fulfill the role. Loss of self-esteem is just one of therewarding than trampling people on your way to the
severe consequences resulting from succumbing totop. Take your posse with you and share the wealth
predetermined societal roles or familial roles. What doand credit. Ask yourself if your plans impinge on
you value about your life? List your goals and valuesanyone else in a way that he or she can no longer
in a hierarchy of what is the most important. Whenbe free. You cannot predict how or when your small
you become rock solid with your values thenact of kindness, compassion or courage might change
pervasive change happens. Did you include yourthe world or land you a promotion.
health near the top? Without your health, you will not9. Keep it Real
have much time to work on your other values andWithout integrity in both public and private actions,
goals. As you take baby-steps in the direction ofthe direction you take will have little to do with a
your "self," expect a backlash of resistance frompositive outcome. Can you raise your self-esteem
family and friends who may try to keep you neatlyand stand for more by selecting different values?
placed as the "old you." That is because they areWhen you incorporate good values that are your
afraid of change.preferences, you will be proud of yourself, and so will
4. Feel the Forceyour associates and family. Right now, you could
You are more than just an individual; you havebegin to stand for something great. Real life soap
history! Your DNA goes back to the first people onoperas have taught us many powerful and important
earth. You have a connection with all the people wholessons on the absurdity of life, proving the maxim:
have ever lived and strived from the beginning of"You always get caught," and and that the first rule
human history. You can add self-esteem by the tonof happiness is to: Stop Lying.
to whatever you have accomplished in your own life10. Commit for the Duration
if you think of yourself as a link in a wonderful chain.No pain, no gain. The last stretch of your journey
Remember the people who have died to win us ourmay require some reaching. Maybe you do not have
freedom from old enemies that we now call ourcomplete assurance that you will succeed, but you
friends, from prejudice, chauvinism, religiousget out there anyway and pound away at your goal.
intolerance, serfdom, slavery- and the list goes onEventually, one day, you are there. Significant change
back through history. You come from a long line ofin your life is only possible with this kind of
people who made good enough decisions to survivecommitment. Do you admire people who commit to
and reproduce. Pretend the heroes and heroines oftheir goals? If so, then choose to commit to what
yesterday are watching. Just imagine if all history isyou want now and if it is not what you want later,
watching. A good decision gene is in you somewhere.you can change direction again. Feel confident, let go
5. Personal Goals and Valuesof all the wavering, questioning and vacillating of
Do you only "follow directions" or do you "think forindecision and simply move forward on your path!
yourself?" The personal goals and values you choose